A question, inspired by a dinner mint

If a mysterious fellow approached you, and told you that he could give you the ability to make your saliva taste like wintergreen, and only when and for as long as you want, and the only contingency was that you could never obtain any other magical power for as long as you lived, would you take it?

Here are my thoughts:
This is obviously not a great magical power, but it would be nice. You know, you'd always have fresh breath and an acceptable flavor in your mouth, and you'd have complete control. The issue for me is the fact that this scenario would introduce to you the possibility of having magical powers. Now aware of the real possibility (or is it real? you wouldn't know for sure until you accepted the dude's offer, would you?), would you jeopardize your (now seemingly real) chances at getting a high-quality magical power like, say, invisibility or flying or superhuman strength or mind control or lobster claw hands, just to have this unimpressive by comparison power? You couldn't, of course, be sure that you would ever have the opportunity for one of the sexier powers, and on-demand wintergreen flavored saliva might be quite pleasant.

But is minty-fresh breath really worth throwing away your potential to do something like this?

Whatever you can do, I can do better

I wonder how often this happens.

(And no, Johnny Utah, I don't mean that I wonder how often ex-soccer players die.)

Everyone just LOVES Jack Bauer

Especially when he deliberately disobeys the president to save innocent lives (hey, I like Jack Bauer just fine too--if the fraidy-cat Nixon lookalike President and Samwise Ganges told me to just let a mall full of people die, I might consider disregarding their orders too).

But then some guy directs two ice trucks to some diabetics during the Katrina aftermath, and he has to go to court and line up 150 supporters just to avoid--possibly--the most severe penalty for compassion the government can think up. Have we learned nothing about mavericks? They get the job done.

Well, at least all the people supporting the Sheriff appreciate his Bauer-esque move.

PS: Did anyone see Robocop on 24 Monday night? I love Robocop, even when he's trying to blow up Jack Bauer.

More Pittsburgh Pirates Comedy

Well, dominant starter Kip Wells (career record 55-69) might have surgery, so the Pirates have these options:

If Wells opts to have surgery on the blood clot near his right arm -- he made no decision as of yesterday, Littlefield said -- the Pirates' only confirmed starters would be Oliver Perez, Zach Duke and Paul Maholm. All are 24 or younger, and Perez's total of 89 career starts towers above Duke's 14 and Maholm's six.

And those are the known commodities.

Of the five pitchers being given a realistic chance to challenge for the rotation, Victor Santos is by far the most experienced with 65 career starts, but he is coming off a 4-13 season with the Milwaukee Brewers and working for his fifth major-league employer.

Tasty.

Maybe Troy Polamalu is looking for something to do in the off-season. He's got nearly as much MLB experience as Paul Maholm.

RIP: Jesse Donald Knotts

Was this piece of AfterFife a preview of Don's afterlife? I hope so, that wacko deserves it.